My pursuit of Christ has been more of a job these days, and you’ve probably experienced a season like this. As much as I’d like to tell you that my faith in Christ has always and only entailed floating from spiritual high to spiritual high, I’d be selling my walk with God woefully short.

But any apathy I fight has everything to do with me and nothing to do with God.

I’m distracted. Consumed. Self-absorbed. Overstimulated.  Maxed out. Unmotivated. Overscheduled.  Emotionally hung over.  Mechanical.  Busy.  Exhausted.

Whether it’s the enemy, my selfishness, or maybe both, the foregoing descriptions become bases for neglecting a small amount of quiet time, set aside, to single-mindedly meet with God each day.

The funny thing about God’s grace is how it finds me.  It meets me in my ugliest, weakest moment, and calls me up out of it.

That grace recently met me in my lack of desire.

It’s been a fight to read God’s Word and meet with Him. And the less I do, the more I forget how sweet and joyful and satisfying and mysterious and alive our God and His Word are.

Just like my love for a human is more palpable, more passionate, and more light the more time I spend with that human–so it is with my love for God.

God does not need to commune with us, though He wants to. But I desperately need to commune with God, and God makes that desire increase because of who God is. Desire for God gives birth to greater desire for God. Time with God breeds more time with God. A small sacrifice of daily time set aside for God produces greater sacrifices for God throughout my day.

One cannot authentically experience the presence of Jesus Christ and not want more, both because of God’s intoxicating characteristics and His work in us.

But we have to go to God to get more because these desires themselves are from God. This very desire to pursue God is a gift from God.  That God would fuel our desire to seek more of God.  This very formula epitomizes the grace of God.

And I could go on.

Although I suspect I’m not the only one fighting apathy these days.

The time you set aside for God is a choice and often an act of discipline, but the joy and peace and wisdom and direction and desire that multiply are a byproduct of time spent with God.  Put another way, I don’t believe that you can spend time with God and not gain fruit.  (Although God’s sovereignty alone is reason enough to spend time with God).

So are you having trouble pursuing God?  Be encouraged.

This is the God whose yoke is easy and burden is light, who watches over you and never slumbers, who satisfies your desires with good things, who called you out of darkness, who crowns you with love and compassion, who loves you with an everlasting love, who draws you with unfailing kindness, who leads you beside quiet waters and refreshes your soul, who began a good work in you and will carry it to completion.

This is the God who pursues you.

“Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:29-30 (NIV).

“He will not let your foot slip–he who watches over you will not slumber.” Psalm 121:3 (NIV).

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9 (NIV).

“Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion.” Psalm 103:2-4 (NIV).

“The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: ‘I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.'” Jeremiah 31:3 (NIV).

“The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul.” Psalm 23:1-3 (NIV).

“[H]e who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6 (NIV).

This is my apology for thinking Panera’s espresso couldn’t hang.  I stand corrected, and I’m not mad about it.

I like my latte like I like my hubbs: a little sweet, but mostly strong. 😉

Much love to you,

Paige